Hi,

Thanks for the advise. I don't have family that can help and his has as much as they can. I am actually taking care of my Grams. Her Doctor  has said we need to get her into a home because she needs more care than we can do- nursing and things. So we are looking into that too. I applied for everything- medicaid, foodstamps and financial. It's a hassle, but I hope it goes somewhere. At this time my fiance will be coming home after bootcamp because he enlisted on a program that keeps him from being deployed while he is in school- so he is going to college. I am very proud of him for all of this. We got the utilities under control with some help from area agencies and I am looking into disability now. The housing agencies have 2 year waiting lists - we will be homeless if I wait for that. My house payment is exhorbitant at $2000 a month so... we are still looking for help to get caught up on that. It would be great if I could get a loan for it. After this month the money situation promises to be better, just got to get over the hurdle in the meantime. Thanks again for all of your suggestions. I know what it's like to come out the otherside of addiction.  

Thank you for responding to me. It's nice to hear from someone who understands; it doesn't seem that anyone around me does. It's a very depressing situation. I appreciate the information and I will be looking into that group today. As opressive as this has been I do feel hopeful that my health will improve steadily, even if not quickly. I have a great guy. It 's amazing what he has been willing to do for me. I thank the universe for him every day.

Again, thanks so much for speaking to me and sharing this information. I hope things improve for you as well.  

I understand the paralyisis of the other kind too. I know that you have read the problems with my health, and those problems are nothing compared to what happens in my head sometimes. I also used to be this strong, independent woman; I fought, for everything, and stood on my own. I am an addict and 6 years ago, I fought to get clean after using for 18 years. Now, because I can't work, I question everything I do, like telling myself that I am just not trying hard enough....

I think that reaching out is the best possible solution for us both, and anyone else that feels this way. First, it keeps us out of our own heads. Second, because we gain strength from our positive relationships. I think this place is a great resource for that and I am glad to have met you. 

Things have been a rollercoaster for a while. I have several health problems that just keep getting worse. The only reason that I have been able to keep working is because I am self employed. I run a daycare in my home and my finace has been able to take care of our daycare kids. In fact he does most everything. He takes care of our own 3 children, does most of the cleaning and grocery shopping, all of the maintenance; there isn't much that I can do. I need to have several surgeries. My doctor feels that I should be placed on disability so that I can focus on my health. Now, the income we are bringing in is no longer paying the bills and we have no health insurance. My fiance has taken second jobs many times to help bring us through, but he hasn't been able to find anything in 8 months. So he joined the military. He leaves for boot camp in a month. He made this decision because of the insurance benefits for me. Without him, I cannot keep doing daycare and we don't know how long it will take to get disability payments started. We are going to be married next week. We aren't even able to have anyone at the service, especially his family, who lives out of state. We are so behind in our payments that I had to apply for assistance to pay our utilities after our gas was shut off. Our power is scheduled for shut off this week. We are also 2 months behind in our house payments. We deperately need help! We are going to loose everything and I don't know what I am going to do without him, especailly if we end up homeless. Any help would be greatly appreciated. We are looking for help to get out of the hole and on our feet. We will repay it all, and pass it on.